Just Friends

Why. are. you. suddenly. giving. me. attention? I remember the last time I heard your voice on the phone. You sat there breathing as I cried to you. You didn't hang up. You just listened. You felt sorry. You texted her and made her feel like shit. That was the first time I saw you stand up for me. Was it because you cared or because you felt the need to protect your other intentions? Gosh, I don't know what to say about you anymore. You're so obnoxious to me. It's not even funny. You hit me and mock me. Is that all you know how to do? FOR ONCE, I want you to look at me again and tell me you're sorry. I think all I really want is to know you're on my side again. When my girls turned against me, I could have cared less. Honestly. Because I knew I still had you, I held on for dear life. Then you left. Wow. I'm living off dying memories. Like when you came to my locker and would put your arm around me and squeeze my guts out but I loved it when you did. Or when you would creepishly creep up on me and hold my hand. Or how we would spend literally hours doing nothing but enjoying each other's company. I miss you. I think I miss you more than anything right now. I miss your reassuring smile. I miss your stupid dimples that I've always wanted to kiss but never got the chance to. I just wished we lasted long enough to prove them wrong. But what did you do? You proved them to be correct and left me looking stupid while you moved on to play around. You never cared, and in the end, that's what hurt. There is no story about you fighting for me. Just the fact that you left me. There is no great story about us. There's NOTHING to hold on to, and yet, I still do.